top of page
  • Writer's pictureR. Rene' Woodard

Out of my Control....


I know it's been a minute. Per usual LIFE has a way of giving you lemons and you have a serious choice to make .... Margaritas or Lemonade? I wish I could stop taking these mini hiatuses from writing to share but that's just not how the GOOD lord works with me and my storytelling. I have learned over the years that there are seasons to speak and there are seasons of silence the same way some seasons are full of questions while others provide the answers to those questions. It is indeed the ebs and flow of life, relationship, and revelation! Often, it’s not that we have writers block, it's that we have too much to say, and it can get really tough to navigate. The key is to identify which season you are presently in and being obedient to it!

When asked what season this is for me .... I really can't put just one word on it. It's transformational, there's transition and lots of unknowns. In the past, I would try to find a word, but today I really can't. The Professional CHANGE AGENT is sitting on the cusp of change STILL.... I say still because this is not new. If like me you too are STILL on the cusp of major or minor change know that you are not alone, the feelings you have are valid and soon you will see why that crazy journey of yours had to be this way!

Now that we have that out the way because per usual that was NOT in today's original share. Let's center together for some quick mid-week encouragement to remind us all why we can still WIN with this HAND.

I was in an accident after I returned from my Birthday trip while a passenger in a LYFT.

A bad one. (To me and all the witnesses that were present, think spinning across a 4-lane highway, hitting a median after being hit by an allegedly drunk driver bad)

I'm ok. Deep bruise, mentally shaken but OK.

Today I feel my best physically so that's a WIN.

I replayed the situation repeatedly in my mind trying to make some sense on how at the close of my amazing vacation and 7 days into year 43 did we get here, in this moment. You know what I realized.... It was due to the selfishness of an alleged drunk driver who really did not care about anyone but himself in the split moment. I also realized that nothing that happened had anything to do with what I did or did not do within my own control. In basic English, there was nothing my hands, heart, mouth, or mind could do to change the outcome of that night ....

It simply was OUT OF MY CONTROL.

On this calm, peaceful yet chaotic Wednesday can I offer you a piece (peace) of Freedom this afternoon. IT IS OUT OF YOUR CONTROL!!! (Say it three times and make it Personal, IT IS, IT WAS, OUT OF MY CONTROL!!) Let me stop Yelling!

The thing that has kept you up all night, which plagues your mind throughout the day is out of your control. There was nothing that you could have done differently because you were not in control. That's a hard pill to swallow at times, especially for my folks that are " fixers". Not being in control makes you feel abnormal from time to time and if you are not careful it can become an addiction. (Inserts breathing room for all readers)

The key to fighting this wicked control battle of yours is simple ...... Let it Go!

Surrender & Release, it was not your cross to bear in the first place.

Many people have robbed themselves of LIFE, OPPORTUNITIES and GOD-Ordained Experiences because their preference was buried in the spirit of control. Since you can't control the narrative, the outcome, or the program you don't want to be a part of it. You will set yourself up for failure and lead with a lifetime of loneliness, frustration, depression, and angst if you don't release the need and desire to control everything mentally, physically and spiritually! Life be Lif'n and 90% of the time the LIFE that happens you did not see coming and it was simply out of your control so why do we hold on to it as if it was? Where's the Grace for the unknown, unexpected, and unplanned?

Living a life of self-inflicted pain due to your desire to have control or be in control is not a good look, the buck must stop here!

Free yourself from the thought that you are powerful enough to CHANGE something that was NOT even assigned to YOU. I can go on with this topic for days because we all have been guilty in a variety of settings and seasons. The kid who can't drive and does not have a license to drive can be mad about being late but there is nothing that they can do about something that is BEYOND their own control and qualifications!

Guess what, the same goes for you!

Yes - had I been driving I would not have even been on that HWY, but I was not driving, and it was OUT of my control. How would I have stopped the drunk driver from hitting the car I was a passenger in? How? With what information or qualification? Was I driving? did I see him? Prior to the accident did I know he was allegedly drunk?

Then why should these incidents or past experiences rob us of sleep, peace, or currency the days ahead. I am not discrediting what happened to ME nor am I discrediting whatever happen to YOU even in its differences. What I am doing is painting the picture of FREEDOM and calling for RELEASE on behalf of us all as it relates to the things that are out of OUR hands.

As you close out the day take these reminders:

  • Releasing Responsibility does not deny your capacity to be strong, it confirms your Intelligence and Self-Awareness. Smart enough to know what’s right, Smart is enough to know what is wrong, Honest enough to know when it does NOT belong to YOU. (Thoughts, issues, people, places, situations, and things- release it!)

  • The most successful person in the room is not always in control of the room. (Sit with that and it will make sense later)

  • You cannot always control what goes on outside, but you can always control what' goes on INSIDE. (Don’t let outside conditions change your heart or happiness, you own this one)

  • Breathe. The playbook is changing daily, control what's yours to control and let the rest GO. When you remove those things that are out of your control, you free up space for the amazing things that are. Those things you are qualified to handle, take the weight off!

In Freedom and Friendship,

R. Rene' ~

Ps. Thank you to everyone for the birthday wishes, cashapp, gifts, mail etc. Despite my lemon experience after a visit to paradise GOD remains faithful and ever knowing and this too shall pass. Be on the lookout in coming weeks, so many things have happened since March, some announcements I have held sacred on purpose, but my sharing season is on the horizon.... stay tuned :)

bottom of page